Love in the ruins

smoky spring update from the Nelsons in Guatemala ❤️

Dear friends,

Hi! Hello. (taps mic, clear throat.) It has been a little while, and the content is piling up.

First, no big news. The kids are FINE, and we are fine, plugging away at being missionaries in Guatemala. A place we love, in spite of some serious cracks in the foundation.

Here’s the recent happenings:

1. Remember my upbeat newsletters from the end of last year? Exalting in the generosity of the God’s people and the capacity I suddenly had to buy a pile of insulin and a prosthetic leg for a patient whose difficult life was so parallel to mine?

Mario died on Christmas Eve. He was 46.

I saw him last in November, and he was finally walking around on his prosthesis, generously purchased by you fine people, who believe in helping when it helps. His youngest daughter came with him to that appointment, and I remember her sitting in his lap, picking at his hair and gazing at him with affection. His blood pressure was high, but he was doing alright, all things considered. I made his follow up appointment for late January, and wished him a merry Christmas.

His sister came in for a checkup in mid-January, and told me he’d died at a family gathering on Christmas Eve. He’d had some chest pain, and then suddenly it became severe and he was coughing up blood. They took him to the hospital and he was dead before midnight. She said that his last words were “El Señor es mi Pastor, nunca me faltara.” (The Lord is my Shepherd, I lack for nothing.)

It’s taken me much longer than usual to get over this one. Talk about a dark night of the soul. I have lost count of the people I’ve watched die, or been intimately involved in their death, over the last couple decades. There are a significant handful that have made me question my faith in humanity, or the goodness of God, or both, and this was certainly one of those.

There are other ways to do this job in the world, to be in a place of healing and helpfulness to people in their bodily existence, but I have this dull, fated calling to care for the poor and I end up watching so many people die that we COULD HAVE SAVED. The bile rises, honestly. Where is God when people are suffering and dying, deprived of dignity and health and fresh air. I dunno. Some of you will say, but you did so much! but WE did so much. And that’s true, of course. But it wasn’t enough, and it’s never enough.

So. If you want to know why this newsletter is tardy, this is why. It’s taken me some time to find the language to talk about this incredible failure and sadness.

2. In much happier news…

…we got vaccines for dengue. This is a nasty mosquito-borne disease that is endemic in most of Central America. It’s a virus, so there’s not much to do except symptomatic support, and prevention. We’ve had it a few times and gotten SUPER sick— fevers, joint pain, extreme-lying-on-the-floor-fatigue, vomiting, rash, liver irritation and a drop in platelets. We heard that you could get a vaccine in Colombia, found some cheap tickets and made a small spring-break trip out of it. I’m so grateful, and looking forward to a rainy season where I’m not so maniacally paranoid about the mosquitos in our house.

3. Work soldiers on.

This kid is the daughter and granddaughter of two of my patients, and happens to be named Sara Abigail. She’s almost twelve. My name is Abigail Sara, so we decided to take a selfie and I made her promise to go to medical school and come work in this community someday.

Truly, clinical work has kept both me and Jeff joyful and balanced (mostly) these last few months. We are both wired for work, and it is a great source of contentment and joy to find the work that we have been called to both meaningful and interesting. Jeff has worked through serious depression and suicidality, marital failure, anxiety, and existential angst with a lot of people this year. I have cleared up some foot ulcers, and kept some kidneys and retinas functional. Who knows what we both might have prevented.

We are dreaming about ways to multiply and grow that work, hoping to figure out a way to do more holistic care, more connected to the local church. I think we would love to be a part of a church plant if we could figure it out. I’d love to grow some capacity to use food as medicine, and to integrate more fully the mental health work we are doing with the care for bodies and work with the church. It’s mostly a pile of ideas, but it’s nice to HAVE some ideas and some hopeful glimpses of the horizon.

4. Home assignment is coming up!

View of Lake Atitlan at our team retreat in February.

We will be in Portland this year from June through August. It has been four years since we’ve been able to spend time there, and we are really looking forward to reconnecting with our old home, many dear friends, supporters, etc. We will worship with several different churches, spend some time making overdue repairs on our house, and I will work part time at my old family practice clinic helping cover one of their provider’s maternity leave. We are working on a tentative schedule of where we will be, but please let us know if you will be around— we would love to catch up however we can.

By way of logistics, we are contemplating buying some sort of cheap used car to have for summer use, but if anyone happens to have an extra vehicle you wouldn’t mind lending us, please reach out!

Hot and tired in Cartagena, April 2025. Cora is 16, Lucie is 13, Hazel is almost-10.

I’ll put a list of prayer requests below. We are incredibly grateful for the support and friendship of you all, for the ways that people check on us, show interest and real partnership in our work, for the generosity of spirit in what feel like dark times.

Much love,

Abbie & Jeff and the girls.

Ways you can pray for us and our team:

• We are just wrapping up a vision trip with a new family. They were in Uganda with Serge for a term, have 3 kids around Hazel’s age, and are exploring a sense of calling to Central America. They are delightful, and could be exactly the infusion of energy and skills our (tired) team could use. Pray for wisdom, clarity, discernment and a smoothing out of the path if that is what God has for them and for us.

• Pray for our team, generally. We’ve been through a lot of death and disaster this year, and everyone is blistered and feeling exhausted in our sense of calling. Pray for Jeff and I to lead the team with compassion and vision, and for Jesus to meet us tangibly in our weariness.

• Our girls are wrapping up the school year. Cora is finishing her sophomore year and starting to think about SAT prep courses, visiting colleges and scheduling internships as she prepares for graduation. We have a lot of heartburn about this whole thing, so pray for our parent-hearts, for wisdom as we consider various options, and grace in parenting as we are staring down the barrel of our first kid leaving home.

• Pray for our home assignment. While we are all looking forward to some time away from the field, Hazel and Lucie are both apprehensive about how to navigate American friendships and what it will be like to be in our old house and community again. The transition back and forth has never been very easy, so I guess just pray for a lot of grace as we do this thing that is so necessary for our sustainability on the field.